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Pathetisad the Comic
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  Comic DerekDerek
Known aliases: Bishma

Derek is our hero since he is me and I am self-aggrandizing. In all respects, however, he is a caricature of me. A simplified me. The me I'd be if I didn't live in a world full of things that piss me off.
Real Derek
Derek has very few driving forces in his life. He is on a daily quest for a girlfriend, Pepsi, and 7 layer burritos. Everything else is just icing on the cake, as they say. In the future Derek may grow and mature, but I wouldn't hold my breath if I were you... I mean that literally, lack of oxygen kills brain cells.
 
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  Comic BenBen
Known aliases: diepunkdie

Ben is, as some would say, a free spirit. Others would say criminally insane. For the most part he does what ever he wants to do. The good news for us is that he's usually too lazy to do any real damage. Real Ben

Think of Ben as a less sad, slightly crazier version of Derek. He is also Jerry to Derek's Tom... as in Tom and Jerry. The cat and mouse from those cartoons. Work with me here people. Anyway, Ben is probably to blame anytime Derek gets hurt or arrested.
 
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  Comic JosephBonnie
Known aliases: Catharsis

In the begining Pathetisad's major focus was about how Derek couldn't find a woman. May loyal readers noticed a shift from this in late 2003. It went unexplained for quite a while before Bonnie was revealed to the comic world. Bonnie was able to see through the weird and sad and fall for Derek. And he fell for her. In late 2005 it was announced via the comic the Bonnie and Derek got engaged. These events mirror (in a fun-house sort of way) real life events bewteen Derek and Bonnie.

Real Joseph
Bonnie's roll in the Pathetiverse seems to be a mix between victim and voice of reason. She holds Ben and Derek back from going too far over the deep-end but sometimes bears the full brunt of their stupidity.
 
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  Comic DildoDildo
Yes, his name is Dildo. Get it out of your system, I'll wait... Ya done? OK. Dildo is one of our more frequent recurring characters. No one knows why. Well, I know why. It's because any time I want to show someone getting hurt I automatically think of Dildo. There's nothing like crushed Dildo to put a smile on my face.

Real DildoOK, the name. Dildo got his name because (back in high school at least) he had a cylindrical body and curly hair. He looked like an upside down dildo. As for his character, he's supposed to be comic relief. I don't know why Ben and I would need comic relief, but I guess we have it. Plus Ben and I spent many of our impressionable years hanging out with Dildo so it's a good bet that a lot of the comedy in our little cartoon drama is partially derived from him.
 
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  Comic MikeMike
Known aliases: Beater

Ah, another lovely nickname. Unfortunately I can't explain this one without revealing his last name. This would open up all sorts of avenues Real Mike

for potential stalkers. So I won't do it... unless Mike tells me that he'd like some stalkers, then I'll reconsider. Mike isn't in the comic much. Frankly I can't think of much use for him. But as soon as I need a belligerent drunk in the comic, Beater will be there.
 
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  Comic JosephJoseph
Known aliases: Krishna

Joseph was the first to sign on as a supporting character. He's actually the only person involved whom I asked if they wanted to be in a comic. Everyone else asked me or was drafted. Joseph is our straight man. Abbot to our Costello if you will. Granted he isn't in the comic much, but then again who is besides me and Ben?
Real Joseph
It's hard to describe a character that isn't around much. The idea behind his character is that he'd be like a control group in an experiment. He's around to show just how pathetisad the rest of us can be. While the real Joseph is far from normal (yes, that's a compliment) his comic counterpart is normal. Or at least as close to normal as my twisted mind can envision.
 
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